few new things

so i have my first day of school at the new school tuesday:)
wooooh..........................
annnnnnnnd in more exciting news, i have my first real dance with a real date on saturday
i went shopping for it today annnd got my hair cut.. i'm not gonna lie... i look hott all dressed up(what? i'm weird? noooo)

oh and got peer court to go to tuesday... yuck
i'll post pics of the dance when it happens
bye peoples

half way to my goal!!!!!!!!!

so since i've started dieting to now i've lost 25 pounds.
started at about 242-ish. and now i'm 215.:) my goal is 190 lbs.
almost there wooh go me!

a girl

a girl of the sweetest sort
enters my home, accesses my life
puts her trust in me
gives me her love , her word
i love this girl, my one, my only, forever
or was this just another dream?
a hopeless dream of a broken man
held together by the thinest of thread
as soon as i look away
she breakks me from inside oout
my heart was the first to go
shattered and stepped on
what have i done to deserve this
she disreguards my questions and walks out the door
i am desperate i need this girl
she used me, i feel betrayed
all i do now is think of what could have been
i am alone... cold... and lost in life
i am broken worse than ever...
and this time i don't think someone will fix me
i miss her

yuckie

So, i made a really stupid mistake a few months back...
Shoplifting
dumb right?
well i thought i got out of it clean and clear... NOT SO MUCH!!!!!!!!

i have to attend a peer court... crappy i know!
my punishment will probably take classes for what i did
i deserve it i know... but it won't stop me from whining:)
you know me

ciao

Death comes to those

right back, here it comes, watch on the shore
dead black, broken down, like blood on the floor
we sink the ship, break it down break it down

ride against us like you did it before (break it down)
come against us like your wanting some more (break it down)
too long we have ridden the waves of your blasphemous mouth
we beat you down when you spit out your words
why won't you just spit out your pride
because then your pain would subside

your face is bloody and your soul is wet
from the tears that you cry
we sit, we wait, till your defences are down
your so sick you've got to sleep now
your broken, so broken

if you give up now we would spare you
but if you fight back (fight back)
we'll kill you
death is on the hunt... and you sit waiting..

ever since

ever since the day i was made
i been sayin' sorry for the things i have done
i create a new way to do what you do
you look at me like i am scum
you beat down my self esteem
you've broken my pride
i've come up with something new
but i'll keep it inside till it because i'm afraid of how you will see me
i don't need the pain
the looks you give me tear me limp from limb
imagine how i feel when you speak against me
i've let you do this far too long
i'm not sorry that i'm different
i'm not sorry that my ways are better
no longer am i in your controll
no longer will i let you abuse me
being alone would be better than this
see the scorn in my eyes
and know this is real

How much longer?

how much more can you possibly take
how many battles can you lose in one day
who is the source of all your pain
how much longer, how much more
how long till you gain some self respect
for once will you just stand up, buck up, and fight
get up, destroy everything that holds you down
every burden, every sign of stress, tear it down
destroy the notions of who you are
look at all your beleifs
down, down, down
tear them down